Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The one where I'm a toilet. Life is good!

Well look who's a big fat fucking liar!


I know I said I'd be back and talk about some shit where I liken myself to a toilet, because I find a bowlful of similarities between myself and a commode. Seriously...some eerie similarities. 

Umm, not exactly..

1)I need to be flushed. I can't have shit just hanging around stinking up the place.

2)I need to deal with the shit and then flush it away so I can start with a clean bowl.

3)I need to be scrubbed regularly.

4)I sweat.

5)I can be a relaxing place to release the bowels of of your inner being (emotionally...don't be gross).

6)I can take a lot of shit before I fucking overflow and ruin your goddamn day.

7)I don't swallow tampons so I wouldn't expect any other toilet to do so. Comraderie and all.

Dude. You're doing it wrong.


It's been 6 months since I busted out with anything.

Just seeing who's listening...



  1. That's the creepiest fucking toilet ever!! No way would I sit on it's face *imagine a lightbulb going on over someone's head to make a RPatz toilet* Just creepy dude..Welcome back freak ;)

  2. I'm listening! Why is that guy so happy to be in the toilet? Maybe he got some cheeeeeeeeeeeeese sauce from a great friend! I bet that's what happened.


Don't be a pussy...say something!