Wednesday, June 16, 2010

My Dashboard is on FIRE...and Leno is still an assmonkey.


I know you know the fuck I'm talkin' bout.

I am well aware that this is not recent. I just like looking at it.

So...Rob rocked The Tonight Show and Jay was his usual asspuppet self. I hate Leno and his cleft chin with the Icy Sparkles of a thousand Vampires. Or more accurately, I hope he girly giggles himself into a seizure.
Is that really mean of me?
Don't answer.

Anywhore...I thought Rob looked luscious and watching his fingers while he played with his phone was nearly instagasmic! Then he gets personal talking about emails from his Dad, and reveals that he is such a dork behind the wheel that he drove around with his dashboard on fire...until it went out.

I am such an asshole. I can't remember where I stole this from.

He sets my dashboard on fucking fire. Still.


That's all I have time for right now my lovely whorefaces, but rest assured I am not gone...just fucking busy! Moving and acclimating to the reality of homeownership. It's fucking trippy.

Mowing sucks nut corn.


  1. Like I said before about the moving - I feel ur pain sista. In the middle of that shit myself. Well, mostly done now, but the new place is a fucking MESS!

    I have no tv or Internet yet, so couldn't see His Royal Yumminess in motion. Sounds like it was a good time. I'm LOVING the shorter hair in the second pic. Mmmmm...

    Sweet dreams


  2. know my thoughts on the Precious.
    More than anything it's cooler than a DIY hysterectomy to see you blogging again. You were missed.

    Now pass me a two liter and some ball peas.

    Much Love.


  3. @TMC ~ I know you share my pain, and you are in the thick (hehe) of the clusterfuck! Let's knock this bitch out! I own shit now so I can call shots to an extent and decorate and delegate, but we won't be moving heavy shit til this weekend. Right now we're still painting and slowly moving boxes and shit. Bah. Fuck I fucking love you. Your gift is on my fridgidaire. Proudly. :)

    @Stoney...DIY only works if you line up the cervix with the nozzle so that proper suction is created! See? I know shit. I love you more than you love chocolate cake...wait...did I just create a paradox? Is it possible to love things more than chocolate cake? Omg...I may have just accidentally created a parallel universe. I blame you. I'm going to live with Stephen Hawking. He gets me.

  4. HA! That second pic of Rob looks like he's looking at my button. I love it.

    Good luck with all the life stuff - it's crazy, innit? Blargh.

  5. Hey E.... Where the fuck have you been.. and don't hand me that happy homeowner horseshit... not buying it.. I was ready to trade in your robgasm card.. #TRUEFACT

    I have missed you HARD! Get back to the blog more often you homeownerwhore you!

    That is all :)


    Missed you much!

  6. At first I thought he was holding a cigar in that second picture. I hate cigars, but he'd find a way to make that look hawt too. Even if he was hacking his lungs out on one right in front of me.

    I hate "mowing" too, both kinds.

  7. @Kelly ~ Awwwwww shucks. *blushes* I've missed you too, and yes you're right...while moving has proven to be a MAJOR vacuum of my time away from my lovely ladies, there have been some personal issues that I've been trying to murder. I'm not going anywhere though! I'm like a rash...just when you think I'm gone, your ass starts to itch. ;D Muahs on your face!

    @TT ~ I thought it was a cigar at first too...but to tell the truth I wasn't really paying attention. I musta got distracted. Hmmm. That's weird. Bahahaaaa on the "mowing" comment!!! Lawns ARE hard to maintain, aren't they??? xoxo

  8. @sEp, I'm surprised I even noticed it beyond his finger in his mouth. He's always got to tease us like that doesn't he!! I'mma print this out and suspend it off a hat so it hangs to the side of my face and looks like he's looking over adoringly at me all day. That's not weird at all, right?

  9. What kinda cigars do you Hoors have? JFC..that shit's bigger than a Horse-Cock sized blunt!

    @TongueTwied...I fucking snorted at your a human mobile like you put over a crib..or the piece of pizza you dangle in front of the fat dude on the treadmill to get him to run faster LMAO..not weird at all ;-)

    Yeah-E-stop using your "I'm a homeowner" hoity-toity bullshit as an excuse & get yer sleazy ass back online!! I like rashes...that's not weird right?

  10. Well, I have seen your page linked on one of favorite today I lick over since your dashboard was on fire... Damne hot photos of the pretty. I will be back more often


  11. @VWL ~ is it wrong that when you call me sleazy I get all gushy inside?? *sniff* You DO know me! Plus, rashes can be a fun distraction from "everyday life"...and I'm still moving, so stay tuned for pics and an epic post where I bitch ad nauseum. YOU ASKED FOR IT BITCHFACE!!!

    @Tigerkitten 36 ~ Welcome to the jungle hookah! I'm honored to have you be privy to my madness. Peep my archives and stay tuned! <3

    Loves on all your faces!


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